The Hit List - Thinksgiving

This year, I did something different for Thanksgiving. Something I’ve always wanted to do but didn’t dare to before.

I said “thanks, but no thanks.” In other words: no.

No to the holiday, no to cooking a big meal, no to the family hubbub, no to all of it. It’s not that I’m being a Scrooge, mind you. Far from it. I’m a generous gal. It’s because I was feeling burnt out from the book tour and the election. I wanted to be alone to recoup and regroup.

I wanted to think.

It was time for Thinksgiving: a quiet day with zero obligations. For an introvert like me, this is heaven.

So I gathered my courage and said “not this year.”

I knew that it would piss people off. For you see, my family adores the puff, the pageantry, the boisterous gatherings where everyone lingers over a shared meal and friends might just drop by unexpectedly for coffee or a beer. Me…not so much. Too long with that festive stuff and I’m looking for the exit and the chance to go home, slip into my pajamas and curl up with a book.

“How come you have to leave so soon?”

Back in the day, I had to feign illness or mutter some stuff about work. For you see, my mother had a black belt in manipulation and guilt trips. Faking was the only way to escape.

But this year, there was no need to fake anything. It was simply “I don’t want to do this. I need to be chill.”

There were a few grumbles and pleas to reconsider but then…begrudging acceptance. I got my way. I was going to be alone.

Thinksgiving came and went without a shred of drama. There was no noise. It was as tranquil as an ashram. I could get inside my head.

No big meal to cook. Not much in the way of clean up. Pajamas all day long.

It was the best Thanksgiving I ever had.

Explaining your introvert nature to a family of extroverts is difficult. They always assume that I’m “being difficult” or “moody.” They don’t understand how much I value my time alone – or how vital it is to me.

And you know what? That’s fine.

I don’t need to explain it at all. To them. To anyone.

If you’re an introvert like me, you may also feel a bit overwhelmed with the holiday hoo-haw. If that sounds like you, here’s my 6 step plan for creating your very own Thinksgiving:

Decide you’re going to do it and make your announcements early.
Don’t make excuses. Just declare that this is what you want and need – and then don’t back down, no matter how much shade is thrown your way.
On the day of, turn off your damn phone. Be unreachable.
Stay in your pjs all day long. (Yes, you can take a shower and brush your teeth. Staying in pjs doesn’t mean being a slob. Unless that’s your thing.)
Get all the books and surround yourself with them. Have reading glasses + chocolate + wine nearby. Order in – or make an easy meal that doesn’t require a lot of effort (I made crab cakes + salad.) Rest up.
No regrets.