The Hit List - The Law of Attraction and Common Sense

Last week, I noticed an interesting conversation about the Law of Attraction started by The People’s Oracle over on Twitter. She made some interesting points and echoed my sentiments around this subject. (PS if you’re not following her, get on it. Her feed is one of my faves.)

In case you aren’t sure what the Law of Attraction is, it’s a philosophy that your thoughts create your reality. While there is some truth to that line of thinking, it’s not without flaws.

Many adherents of LOA (I’ll use this abbreviation from this point forward) not only assume you can attract what you want by focusing your mind but they also claim that if you are attracting bad things into your life, that’s on you too. For example, if you get sick with a rare type of cancer, somewhere in your thinking, you brought this on yourself.

That’s like saying a woman who gets assaulted asked for because she wore a short skirt.

In other words: it’s blaming the victim.

Life doesn’t work like that. Sometimes bad shit happens to people for no other reason than life being a random asshole. Also we need to take into account that not everyone is going to have the ability to manifest their way out of their situation. Circumstances such as oppression, illness, lack of opportunity or education, and poverty can and does hinder a person’s ability to manifest some super-duper wealthy life. In some cases, all the wishing in the world won’t make a difference unless you get some help along the way. And here’s a truth around that: not everyone is able to get the hand up they need to move up in the world.

That’s not due to “negative thinking” on their part – that is due to circumstances beyond their control.

You cannot explain away things like that by saying “oh well, you created that reality with your thinking.” No one wishes to be poor. No one is putting out energy that says “Hey, I want my two year old to get a terminal disease!” No group of people sit around thinking “Gee, I sure hope we get a tsunami that wipes out our village.” NO ONE.

Although I’m a firm believer that a positive mindset helps, do note that when you’re down and out, often times your only thought is about your next meal or finding a job. Telling someone in that situation to “just think positive” is neither helpful nor compassionate. We need to put a little empathy and common sense behind the LOA philosophy.

Again, there are things that really, truly are outside of our control. No matter how hard you may be wishing away or what intentions you set – you must remember that other people want the same things – or may be opposed to what you want.

Let’s use this situation to illustrate my point. I have the hots for Nikolaj Coster-Waldau. He’s the guy that plays Jaime Lannister on Game of Thrones. Check out this gif below and you’ll see what my fuss is about. (Droooollllll….)

via GIPHY

Now, I can set all the intentions in the world around meeting and dating him. I can create a vision board or a shrine and pray to it every day. I might even take inspired actions to make my intention happen by showing up on the Game of Thrones site wearing a bathing suit and a come-hither look. (Yeah, this is a ridiculous thought but bear with me.) Chances are, even with all that effort and every magical rite in the world, it’s not going to happen. Not because I can’t put my mental powers to work here but because LOGIC, people.

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is a famous man. He’s also very married. So am I. I’m also some 50-something year old tarot bag and I no longer look that great in a swimsuit. Plus – we’re both busy. And he probably gets plenty of attention from far more desirable people than me. Heck, he even gets to dry-hump Cersei, played by the luscious Lena Headley. What the hell more could he want? I highly doubt all my good efforts would lead to my desired result. (In fact, I would probably get arrested.) LOA people might say “oh see, you’re being negative!”

NO. I am realistic.

I know that no matter how hunky I think Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is and no matter what magical machinations I may try, I’d be lucky if I even got a tweet from this guy! (Does he even tweet? Hmm…..)

My point is: setting intentions and positive thinking are great and they help. And yes, I DO use them. But some situations aren’t quite as simple as creating a vision board and manifesting your desires. We need to keep that in mind before we start assuming people’s bad fortune has to do with their “negative thinking.” That rationele only serves in making people feel like crap. One thing I can assure you is this: everyone wants shelter, money, food, clean water, education, good health and love. (PS plenty of people want to win the lottery too.) I am positive that most people think about those things all the time. But not everyone will get those things. Because: life.

So let’s stop with what I call “spiritual shaming” – making people feel as if they are not positive enough to reap the goodies in life. Let’s remember that life isn’t always fair and the Universe isn’t your butler, sitting around waiting for your orders.

If you want something or are looking to improve your life, by all means, employ LOA and take positive, pro-active steps towards your goals (again: I DO). But do keep a bit of common sense and compassion along the way.

Allrighty then – time to get back to that My Jaime™ vision board….

Can’t wish my youth back – nor do I want to.

Other stuff:

How one woman got out from under her clutter.

From Learn Savvy: desktop feng shui. Gonna try this!

Good advice over at Tough Nickel: How to start your own tarot business.

Interesting: How the children of Nazy Germany remember World War Two.

Bussed out: how America moves its homeless.

What to cook when you have the flu.

Over at the Huff Post: A ‘Super Blue Blood Moon’ Is Going To Light Up The Sky. Here’s Where To See It.

From Sanctuary World: Divination by the Book – a glimpse into bibliomancy. Super intrigued by this!

Are you in Los Angeles? Join me and photographer Danielle Cohen on March 10th for Through a Tarot Lens, a day-long exploration of tarot + intuition through photography.

Soon we’ll be entering the Year of the Dog. Read Narrye Caldwell’s take on it here.

Give it time. Wisdom from Tanya Geisler.

Love this from Alexandra Franzen: As long as it takes.

Get to know The Mother of El Salvador’s Trans-Rights Movement.

Peter Dinklage says it’s time to end Game of Thrones.

Not too late: 4 New Albums To Listen To In January 2018.

Brushes and Cards: a day-long workshop with Intuitive Painter Chris Zydel and yours truly. July 8th. Yummy food. Tarot. Intuition. Painting. What more could you want? If you’re in the Bay Area, get in on this!

Cool: Join Itchy-O in Wishing Alejandro Jodorowsky a Happy Birthday.

Excellent post from Asali Earthwork: Number patterns in tarot.

Don’t Call Her a Victim: After Surviving Opioids, Nan Goldin Goes After the Makers.

Excellent post over at Pantheos: The Corner Crone: Is Therapy in the Cards?

Hey. You deserve something nice. Flowers, wine, or maybe… The Astro-Biz Digest. It’s an astrological forecast + planning guide especially for entrepreneurs. A 1-year subscription is $99—which breaks down to less than $2 per week! Your subscription begins on whatever day you sign up. Why not… today? #TreatYoSelf

Also check this out from Virtue Centered Tarot: Why more people are choosing tarot readers over psych therapy.

Ooooo: Bite Beauty’s First Astrology Lipstick Is Aquarius — and It’s Already Sold Out at Sephora.

Hmmm…What It Means If You Dream Your Significant Other Is Cheating On You, According To Experts.

GROSS: Harvey Weinstein’s Former Assistant Was Required to Clean Up After His Sexual “Encounters.”

I got my son this cool Weego Jump Starter kit for his birthday. If you drive a lot like he does, you need this!

This looks amazing: Chinese Soul Food: A Friendly Guide for Homemade Dumplings, Stir-Fries, Soups, and More.

Putting this on my list: Dinner Illustrated: 175 Meals Ready in 1 Hour or Less.

Tarot in Wonderland is coming soon – and it’s adorable!

CANNOT WAIT for this: The Book of Tarot: A Guide for Modern Mystics by Danielle Noel.

And these: Work Your Light Oracle Cards by Rebecca Campbell and Danielle Noel.

Oh and this from Liz Dean: The Tarot Companion: A Portable Guide to Reading the Cards for Yourself and Others.

Still struggling to learn how to read tarot? Check out my book, The Tarot Coloring Book. It’s the perfect vehincle to get you going!