The Hit List - Laughing at fear

I had two wisdom teeth removed a few days ago. Although I was dreading this procedure, I knew it needed to happen. My bite was misaligned and these guys were the culprit. They had to go.

Most people get their wisdom teeth removed at some point. Waiting until you are almost 60 to do it? That’s not usual. Frankly, I hoped this day would never come.

The thought of ripping something out of my skull didn’t sound appetizing, even though the nice lady at the front desk assured me it wouldn’t be as dreadful as I imagined. In fact, she said it would be the “easiest thing I’d do that day.”

Was I skeptical? You betcha.

Soon my dread deepened when a well-meaning person decided to share their wisdom teeth removal horror story. I don’t know why people do this or why our brains tend to fixate on those random worst-case scenario tales of woe, but sure enough, I plugged right into that.

Suddenly, my dread turned into a quiet panic. I’m great at putting on a brave front, but underneath it all, I was scared stiff. My fear was so great, that I lost two nights of sleep worrying about what might go wrong.

This reminded me of the time when I was pregnant with my first child. A relative shared all the gory details of her birth trauma and pronounced this would be my fate too. Needless to say, this added a great deal of fear to what should have been a joyful time in my life. My anxiety got so out of hand, I ended up buying some hippie book about “how to have an easy childbirth” and practiced the exercises religiously. Even still, I was now convinced I was doomed to a horrific experience just like her.

But that didn’t happen. I’m not sure if it was luck or that hippie book, but I had an easy 4-hour delivery. My experience was completely the opposite. All that angst ginned up for nothing.

When I went into the oral surgeon’s office, I was terrified. My son came with me, which was a good thing since he’s pretty damn funny. He always seems to lighten up the mood in the room.

Billy Joel was playing in the background (oddly soothing) as the assistant walked me back to what I assumed would be my chamber of doom. Somehow, this seemed kinda bizarre…and funny.

As I sat in the chair and got numbed up, she asked if I wanted nitrous aka laughing gas. I’ve never done it in the dentist’s office before but this time I said “YES, please,” especially after she promised I’d feel like I just had a nice glass or two of wine.

Soon my mouth was numb and I was high as Willie Nelson when the oral surgeon came in. As he began to gently remove the wisdom teeth, “Life’s Been Good” by Joe Walsh was blaring away. I was calm at last, safe in his hands or too high to care. In less than a minute, the teeth were out.

Yep, it was over just like that. No pain, no horror movie, no drama. As the front desk person said, it was the easiest thing I did that day.

I’m healing perfectly so far. I didn’t even need the prescribed pain pills.

Once again, I learned that other people’s terrible stories are not a guarantee I’ll have the same experience. The next time someone decides to inject their fear into your story, turn the channel. Turn up the Joe Walsh and focus on how good your life is instead. And if all else fails, ask for the laughing gas.

Pretty in pink peony.

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Classes

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