The Hit List - Fate, free will, and all that jazz

My friend Dave and I were born exactly one year and one day apart. We were kindred spirits in many ways, two Geminis with a brother/sister cosmic bond that I didn’t share with my own blood siblings. I adored him.

Although our birthdays were close, our astrology charts were markedly different. He had better aspects while mine was a tangled mess that often caused astrologers to wince. My destiny: didn’t look so great according to the stars.

The differences didn’t stop there. Dave was handsome as can be, charming and popular, with a good upbringing while my family was highly dysfunctional and I was more of an ugly duckling.

He had everything stacked in his favor while the odds were not on my side.

Yet our paths seemed to go the opposite of our laid-out destinies. He became a homeless drug addict and died young, while I overcame my challenges and managed to create a happy, healthy life and successful business.

How did this happen? With the fates in opposite corners and all the opportunities unevenly divided, why did his path go one way while mine went completely against the astrological/life blueprint I was handed?

Free will.

We both had choices to make. I chose to tough it out and bust my ass while he chose the needle. At any time, either one of us could have changed places. Our choices created our destiny.

There is a lesson in this: no matter how good you have it, no matter how great the tarot cards are before you, no matter how lovely the aspects in your astrology chart, you can still make choices that turn your life upside down. This applies to the opposite too – you can have a gnarly chart, “bad” cards, and a crappy childhood but find a way to dig yourself out of that and into a fabulous life.

I’m a firm believer in the cards and astrology but I am also an adherent to free will.

Your life – your choice. As my mother used to say “your life is what you make of it.” It’s up to you to make the right decisions no matter what your circumstances may be. No tarot reader or astrologer can do that for you nor can they guarantee an outcome. Decisions you make at any given time can impact the future.

If you’re looking for a future completely laid out for you with every detail micromanaged, don’t look to tarot or astrology. Look within. These things serve merely as a guide – the ultimate outcome will be determined by you and you alone. You are the only person who will have 100% accuracy for your future. Choose wisely, friends.

That’s me and Dave about 20-something years ago on a Halloween evening. Every time I look at this picutre, I see the man that was and it always makes me want to cry. (PS yes, he’s wearing red makeup all over his face – he was supposed to be a demon!)

Other stuff:

My post about Dave after he passed away: On loving an addict. Almost 4 years have gone by and I still miss him dearly.

I loved talking with the good people at Refinery29 about the 5 Different Tarot Card Spreads For The Total Beginner.

This guy collected over 15,000 do not disturb signs.

My good friend Sasha Graham just launched The Enchanted Kitchen. Tarot + food? What’s not to like?!

Angela Mary Magick sprays are my new fave thing. You’ll love ’em too.

Give them the mic: Black Parkland Students Want Peers To ‘Share The Mic’.

7 ways to fight the wage gap on Equal Pay Day — and every day.

Good read: A Forgotten Latina Trailblazer: LGBT Activist Sylvia Rivera.

I LOVE this from Design Sponge: Advice & Etiquette: Handling Offensive Comments + Conversation.

Psychic Jodie Harvala has a marvelous online class starting on Monday: Affirmations + Intentions.

Matt Auryn asks a good question: How Legit is Studying Magick Online?

This list is essential: 9 Books About Feminism & Gender Equality To Read Instead Of Asking A Someone To Explain It.

Good to know: a beginner’s guide to hot flashes.

Looking like myself is getting expensive.

In tarot news: Watch Jenna Dewan’s Eerily Accurate Tarot Card Reading That Foreshadowed Channing Tatum Split.

I did this years ago and it was SO good: The Tweak I Made To The Kondo Method That Totally Works For Me.

Great post from KC Alexander: When tarot cards don’t want to play.

Digging this: 9 Myths About Witchcraft That Modern-Day Witches Like Me Are Tired of Hearing.

Good advice: How to leave a toxic job when you’re paralyzed by anxiety.

OMG: This Incredible ‘Game of Thrones’ Theory Will Make You Root for the White Walkers.

Loving this from Rebelle Society: 4 less talked about golden rules for manifesting.

Confession: I love homemaking books. Must be the Venus in Cancer thing. Looking into this: Home Sweet Maison: The French Art of Making a Home.

Do you struggle to learn the meanings of the tarot cards? You’re in luck! The Tarot Coloring Book is a hands-on way of connecting to the cards!

Damn this looks good: First We Eat: Good Food for Simple Gatherings from My Pacific Northwest Kitchen.

I am curious about Comey’s book, A Higher Loyalty: Truth, Lies, and Leadership.

This looks like a must-read: Yes We (Still) Can: Politics in the Age of Obama, Twitter, and Trump.

SUPER interesting: How to Change Your Mind: What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence.

WANT: The Moon Oracle: Let the Phases of the Moon Guide Your Life.

Here are my upcoming live classes:

Intuitive Tarot Reading at New Renaissance Books. Date: Tuesday, July 3rd from 6:30 PM – 8:30 PM. Location: Portland, Oregon.

Brushes and Cards: a fun day-long event with painting + tarot. You’ll be in good hands with me and intuitive painter, Chris Zydel. Date: Sunday July 8th. Location: Oakland, California.

Pens and Cards: a day full of tarot exploration and writing with author Sarah Selecky and moi. Date: October 13th. Location: Skybarn, Prince Edward County, Ontario. Only three seats left!

Intuitive Tarot Reading at Boston Tea Room. Date: Sunday, October 14th. Location: Ferndale, Michigan.