Do men and women read tarot differently? Is the guidance we offer the same – or is there a distinct masculine/feminine edge to our words? Join Matt Williams and myself each month as we tackle questions sent in from our readers and see how different – or similar – we really are with our interpretations and advice.
We will each prepare a reading separately and then comment on each other’s interpretations and put this all together in one fun (and thought provoking) post for our readers to enjoy.
This isn’t a “tarot battle of the sexes” – this is an exploration, a mash up, a contemplation.
If you’d like to see your question featured, send it to me at tarotlady@wi.rr.com or Matt at info@personaltarotwithmatt.com with “He Said She Said Question” in the subject line.
Question from Joyce: I have a question. My oldest son (Jerry) is 24 yrs old..He has a 3 ½ yr old daughter but he is not in a relationship with the child’s mother (Ashley) at this time…to say the relationship between my son and the mother is stressful is putting it mildly. The situation is very precarious because of issues the mother is facing, my granddaughter is a year and half past a stroke she suffered and is recovering fine….Do you see any peace down the road between the two young parents?
Theresa’s reading: 8 of Wands reversed; Ace of Swords reversed; 10 of Swords. Starting out with the 8 of Wands, we see that this issue has become stagnant. Traditionally, this card is about moving forward – when reversed, it suggests that this issue may remain at a standstill for an indefinite period. Wands are also about action and it appears to me that neither the son or the mother of the child are budging. In order for this to move towards a healthy direction, something needs to give. And I don’t see that here.
The Ace of Swords also indicates that the thinking and communication between this young couple seems to be aggressive and prone to battle. This is a card of conflict and old wars continuing. Those first two cards seem be calling for a “truce” – someone needs to be the bigger person here if these two are ever going to see progress.
And then we get the 10 of Swords. Now this is another difficult card! Here we see a man lying on the ground with swords in his back. But on closer inspection we also notice a sunrise in the background. That says to me that these two may continue to hurt each other for an extended period. Perhaps the reason these two are not getting along is because there is a lot of unresolved hurt and they both feel a need to punish the other. Eventually, they will get sick of this dynamic and the negativity may peter out. A new beginning is there – somewhere – but it will only emerge when either these two decide to grow up or until they get tired of the drama.
Because of the negative nature of these cards, I decided to pull another one for advice. I got the 7 of Pentacles. This says that perhaps Joyce can help by listening to each side and offering practical advice. If there is a way that she can remain steadfast and stable for both parents and the granddaughter during this difficult time, perhaps she may be able to guide her son towards taking some grounded actions and working towards peace. It won’t be an easy task but if there is one person in the situation that can be the mature and patient one, it may evolve quicker.
Matt’s comments about Theresa’s reading: I love how Theresa’s cards picked up on so much tension and hostility between the couple. This really echoed for me the fact that both parents have been holed up in their personal bubbles assuming their viewpoint was the correct one. This is a total “blame game” and I am in full agreement that someone needs to step up to the plate and be the mature one. I do have to disagree with Theresa on one aspect though. In regards to Joyce’s possible role in providing advice and guidance, I see her focus needing to be primarily on her granddaughter. Any advice she gives to either side right now has strong potential to be viewed by the opposition as playing sides. A key part of the parents maturing and resolving this conflict is for them to shift their perspectives on their own. Lay it down hard and fast for them, Joyce. You will do everything you can for the baby but the parents need to put their focus there too. It’s time to grow up and focus on raising your baby not fighting with each other.
Matt’s reading: The overwhelming feeling I have in this reading is one of a need to change perspectives immediately. With the 10 of Cups leading off the insight, there is a strong call to keep the focus on the blessings that Jerry and Ashley have both been given in life. The birth of a child is always a blessing and a huge responsibility. When there are medical challenges associated with your children, it can add to the difficulty of raising them and can strain the parents to unbelievable limits. It is very easy to lose sight of the joy that children bring and the blessing that they are a living extension of you. It is each parent’s responsibility to show their children how to appreciate the gifts that we are given in life and accept challenges with grace and style.
I see the Two of Pentacles as a representation of Ashley’s energy in this relationship. Given the option, she has a tendency to put her focus on the negative aspects of a situation and only sees the doom and gloom. Though she may come off very pessimistic and possibly even accusatory, this is a safety mechanism that she has put in place to help her deal with disappointment and frustration. If she sees only the possible negative outcomes, she will not be let down if they happen and will be pleasantly surprised if things go right. Unfortunately, the Universe hands us exactly what we ask for in these situations too. As long as she maintains this negative outlook, she will continue to find her thoughts coming true and the worst case scenarios coming true.
Jerry’s energy is coming through in the Two of Wands and seems to be speaking of escaping from the current situation. Jerry’s focus seems to be very misplaced as well in that he can’t seem to be content in the here and now. Regardless of how things are going and what blessings or frustrations are going on, he wants to be “anywhere but here”. I see him imagining a way to just get out of the situation entirely and start over. The interesting thing that I see though, is that if he did get a chance to start over, I don’t think he would do things much different. The figure in this card is looking to the figure in the Two of Pentacles and both are looking in the direction of the Ten of Cups. Deep down, I do think that both of them are seeking the same thing. However, there is a disconnect on how they see the peace and prosperity of their family coming into being. Both parents need to shift the focus to the immediate welfare and quality of life for their child. There needs to be an understanding that you do not have to love, or even like, the other parent to raise your child lovingly and get along.
Theresa’s comments about Matt’s reading: I thought Matt was able to give great insight into the situation. His interpretations are very even handed – I often wondered if a male reader would be more sensitive to the male’s viewpoint in a situation like this. Not so here. Matt’s reading was sound and logical – and I agree with his advice for the couple. However, I also felt that the grandmother needed advice more than the couple at this point – which is why I turned the question towards her. Matt focused primarily on the couple instead. Does the couple need to handle this alone – or can the grandmother be of assistance? I am intrigued that Matt and I had a completely different take on that.
Blessings,
Theresa
Matt
http://personaltarotwithmatt.com/
What do you think? What advice would you give Joyce? Do you see any difference or similarity in our readings? What surprised you? Post your thoughts in the comment section below:
I’m Theresa Reed (aka, The Tarot Lady). I’ve been a full-time tarot reader for 30+ years — which, in my industry, makes me pretty badass.
I’m definitely not your average Tarot expert — I drop the F-bomb, I quote rappers, and I’m obsessed with pop culture + reality TV. Folks come to me for straight-talk + tough-love — without the woo-woo fluff. 
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