Tarot To The Rescue: Competition

Tarot To The Rescue is a monthly feature.  I’ll be tackling different life issues and showing you how tarot can be a valuable tool to help you navigate through these challenges.  As a long time tarot reader, I have used the cards myself to seek guidance, check my own inner compass and find direction through those sticky moments in life. 

 

I recently received an email from a client asking me how to deal with a “competitor”.  While this question was actually about a romantic rival, competition is a theme that crops up again and again in a variety of situations.

Elections.

Sports.

Amour.

School.

Sibling rivalry.

Business.

Money.

Job interviews.

Even if we don’t like competing, we find ourselves doing it constantly. Sometimes even unconsciously.

This can lead to a continuous cycle of COMPARING.  How do we stack up?  How can we “best” the competition?  How do  I look?

COMPARE AND DESPAIR.

Competing can bring up a variety of emotions: fear, anxiety, superiority, inferiority, giving up, etc.

But yet it also inspires us to do our very best. To push ourselves beyond our comfort zone.  To strive.  If we didn’t have something or someone to measure against, we may just sit back in apathy.  And this breeds stagnancy.

A competition can make us work harder than we ever have before.  If there is a prize (money, recognition, love, etc.) we may feel driven to succeed beyond our wildest dreams.

I’ll never forget when my mother brought my sister home from the hospital.  I was a precocious 2 year old with two brothers.  The only girl.  And I enjoyed that status very much.   At the time my mother gave birth to my sister, I had broken a leg and was stuck in the hospital for six weeks in traction.  My poor parents had to leave me at there  so that they could tend to the rest of their brood.

I came home to see that my position had been usurped by a heartbreakingly beautiful baby sister who could charm the pants off anyone (she can still do that to this day – and she’s still gorgeous).  So what did I do?  I put a centipede in her bed and then tried to push her out of the crib.

My first “competition” brought out the very worst in me.

While this may be a funny anecdote, many grown adults also want to drop a centipede – or worse – when faced with a viable “contender”.  Or they simply give up.  Walk away.  Abandon ship.

Being ruthless or having a defeatist attitude serves nothing except to bring us to the lowest common denominator.

We must seek a balanced perspective when we are faced with any sort of “opponent” (real or imaginary).  Whether that be in love or work, competition does not have to be painful.  In fact, it can be downright healthy if we look deeper into the situation.

Here’s a tarot technique to use the next time you find yourself freaking out over a competitor:  reflect on your current issue and then create some questions around the situation.  Shuffle your cards as you meditate on your questions.  Fan your cards out and then pull one for each question.

Here are the questions I came up with for dealing with competition:

1. How is this situation serving my highest good?
2. What can I learn from my competitor?
3. What can I do to make this a productive experience?

Notice I did not ask how to swing things in my favor (although that can be a question).  I’m looking at UNDERSTANDING the situation and trying to use it as FUEL.

Now let’s apply this to a question.  Using the one from my client as an example, we’ll ask about the woman she feels is gunning after her man.  Here are the answers:

1. How is this situation serving my highest good?  4 of Pentacles – in this card, we see a man holding on tightly to his coins.  This suggests that the client may be struggling to trust her man and may be feeling possessive.  When people begin to hold on too tightly, it sometimes squeezes the life out of a relationship.  This current situation may be allowing my client to recognize her fears surrounding losing the man in question – and it may be alerting her to her own insecurities and perhaps giving her an opportunity to explore trust issues and jealousy.  By facing those emotions head on, she may be more likely to conquer them.
2. What can I learn from my competitor?  3 of Wands – here we see a man standing back and looking outward.  This indicates that the client may be gleaning a new perspective on her relationship and her self.  Perhaps she has gotten into a rut.  Now that there is a rival on the horizon it may be time to see if she can inject fresh light and love into her current relationship.
3. What can I do to make this a productive experience?  Wheel of Fortune reversed – I would advise the client not to take any major actions until she has looked within.  This whole situation seems to be directing her towards inner work.  She may want to consider old patterns that may be at play here.  Has she lost a previous love due to another person interference?  Does she feel powerless and like this is out of her control?  Is she struggling to hold on to something that perhaps is no longer healthy?  This says that she needs to keep questioning her own feelings rather than looking to the outer events (or the other people involved) before taking any action.

I would advise her to focus less on the rival and more about her own inner dialogue.  This may be time to visit a couples therapist and to try to create healthy communication with her partner before this situation becomes bigger – in real life – or in her mind.

“Competition is easier to accept if you realize it is not an act of oppression or abrasion – I’ve worked with my best friends in direct competition” ~ Diane Sawyer

Blessings!

Theresa

https://www.thetarotlady.com