Soul Proprietor - The exception

Ever have a conversation like this:

You: “I’m sorry but I don’t [insert your policy here].”

Client: “Why not? Why can’t you make an exception for me?”

If you never have, I can tell you that it is one of the most uncomfortable conversations any soulful proprietor will ever experience.

You want to have policies but you want to be nice. So when someone demands that you make an exception, you start to feel like you’re being backed into what I call “the polite corner.” If you say no and uphold your policy, they get mad and think you’re a jerk. This might be followed up by a plea, then a guilt trip, and finally a threat to take their business elsewhere to “show you.”

If, however, out of politeness (or fear of losing business), you bend your policy, now you feel like a business doormat.

Which is not a good feeling. Because that leads to this vibe: resentment and an overall icky energy between you and the client.

It’s a terrible position to be in.

How can you avoid it?

You can’t. There will always be those who want an exception. Sometimes, they have a legit reason. For example, they may be in town for just that one day – the day you don’t work. In that case, if this is a good client of yours, you may feel like doing it.

But often, that’s not the case. Some people just don’t like the rules.

This is something I’ve been forced to deal with over and over. “Why not me? I’m friends with so-and-so. This isn’t fair.” etc., etc.

The request for that exception often feels like an aggressive push. And yes, some people have even gotten nasty. They don’t want to respect my no. Learning to hold my ground has been a challenging practice.

Here’s how I’ve learned to handle it:

Create clear policies. Make sure they are visible on your site – and, for good measure, you may need to include those policies in your email communications with clients. (For example, I clearly state when I confirm an appointment that I require a 24 hour notice for cancellation. If I don’t get that, payment is forfeited.)

Enforce those policies for everyone. EVERYONE.

If the person demands to know why, you don’t need to explain a thing. Keep your explanations shorts and simple “I’m sorry but this is the way I prefer to work.” or “Sunday is family day and I don’t see clients.”

Be helpful and offer them alternatives. “I’m not available today but I do have openings on Tuesday. Would you like to schedule something then?” or “I don’t offer same-day email readings but I do have a list of referrals. Would you like me to send you that list?”

If they get shitty with you, end the conversation. You shouldn’t feel forced to do anything in your business that you don’t want to do.

If you ever decide to make an exception, it needs to be RARE. I learned that the hard way when I allowed an old client to bring a new person into my office (I no longer allow in-person sessions for new clients – my work is strictly phone + email) on the agreement that this is a one time deal – and guess what? The new client went and told their friends who wanted to come in-person too – and then got pissy when I said no. Keep your exceptions as scarce as a dodo bird and only for people you trust 100%.

Look, it’s always lovely to be the exception. It feels all special ‘n stuff. But in business, your exceptions need to be the exception.

Blessings,

Theresa