Nothing’s Shocking – The Art Of The Pokerface

I tossed a couple of cards and glanced at them, noticing that they were a rather “odd” combination but ultimately indicated a successful ending.  After a look of relief and joy swept over her face, my curiosity got the best of me and I asked her what kind of party she was throwing (assuming it was some sort of masquerade or something unique).  “Oh we’re getting a bunch of crack and having a wife swapping party” she said without batting an eye.

Did my jaw drop at this announcement? Nope. I didn’t flinch a bit.  My reaction (or lack thereof) was as casual as if we were discussing the weather.As a tarot reader, you’ll find that there are all kinds of situations that your clients may inquire about.  While the majority of people like to ask about family, work or love, on rare occasion you may encounter someone who has a shocking or upsetting situation that they need (and deserve) answers to.So what can a good reader do when a client lays something heavy on you?  You’ll need to work that pokerface, yo. 

1.  Leave your judgments at the door.  As the old saying goes: different strokes for different folks.  We can’t always understand other people’s motives and/or emotions – nor do we need to as tarot readers.  We are only here to deliver information and help guide the client.  If you have a particular attitude about a certain lifestyle, get over it.

2. Don’t be a moralist. A wife swapping crack party is not my cup of tea but I have no business trying to force others to conform to my own worldview.  I have learned to hold my tongue and mind my own karma.  Be ethical in your advice but refrain from windy criticism or lectures. The client may already feel bad enough without your sidebar.

3.  Desensitize yourself a bit. This may sound like strange advice, but a few years living in a very bad neighborhood in New York and hanging out with some seedy characters allowed me to become less “shockable”.  While I still encounter a situation here and there that may raise an eyebrow, I’ve seen enough crazy things that I am rarely surprised by people’s behaviors.

4.  Be honest about your own skeletons in the closet.  I’ve got quite a collection of them myself and sometimes sharing my own mistakes and war stories shows the client that they are not alone and helps them deal with feelings of shame or fear.

5. Practice compassion. You must always walk a mile in someone else’s shoes before you judge them.  Any time I find myself getting too self righteous, I remember the saying: there but for the grace of God go I.  Meaning that we could ALL end up in any situation at any time. We  must never think that we are above making critical mistakes or getting into messy situations.  Even the most educated people can screw up majorly!  Compassion is not pity – it is the ability to understand someone on a deep level and truly care about their well being.

A tarot reading may be the one place where someone can – and should be able to – freely share their life stories.  As a tarot reader, you need to embody the trust of a priest, the compassion of a therapist and the humor of a comedian in order to help your clients feel safe and heard.

Blessings!
Theresa
www.thetarotlady.com

© The Tarot Lady | Theresa Reed | www.thetarotlady.com